Life, in Spite of Me
Extraordinary Hope After A Fatal ChoiceBook - 2010
Why does my life have to be so painful?
What's wrong with me?
It's not going to get better.
It could all be over soon, and then I won't hurt anymore.
Kristen Anderson thought she had the picture-perfect life until strokes of gray dimmed her outlook: three friends and her grandmother died within two years. Still reeling from these losses, she was raped by a friend she thought she could trust. She soon spiraled into a seemingly bottomless depression.
One January night, the seventeen-year-old decided she no longer wanted to deal with the emotional pain that smothered her. She lay down on a set of cold railroad tracks and waited for a freight train to send her to heaven…and peace.
But Kristen's story doesn't end there.
In Life, In Spite of Me this remarkably joyful young woman shares the miracle of her survival, the agonizing aftermath of her failed suicide attempt, and the hope that has completely transformed her life, giving her a powerful purpose for living.
Her gripping story of finding joy against all odds provides a vivid and unforgettable reminder that life is a gift to be treasured.
Includes notes of encouragement Kristen wishes she had received when she was struggling most.
From the Hardcover edition.
From the critics
QuotesAdd a Quote
"He reached down from heaven and rescued me; He drew me out of deep waters. He led me to a place of safety; He rescued me because He delights in me." --Psalm 18:16, 19; verses Kristen cherishes and bases her "Reaching You" ministry upon. From her book and Web Site.
"You said you were run over by thirty-three freight-train cars at fifty-five miles per hour, correct?" "Yes, that's what the police report says." "Kristen, you should have been sucked up under that train . . . ." As the man spoke, I thought about the sucking sensation when the train first went over me, and then I remembered the force pushing me down. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach, It had to have been the hand of God, holding me down, protecting me." -- Page 188, Kristen's conversation with a railroad engineer, who'd seen such suicide attempts before.
"You know, we didn't think you were going to make it. You lost about eight pints of blood. People are supposed to die after they lose five. . . .There's no doubt God saved your life that night, because medically . . .well, medically your survival was impossible." Page 165 one of the paramedic there that night whom she later met. He told her how it had been too foggy to life-flight her out and how they made the forty-minute trip in only eight minutes.
The momentum of the cars pulled at me, as if the train were trying to suck me into itself.The wind tugged harder, wrenching at my jacket and yanking my hair upward. My body rose, lifting slightly. Then, even more powerfulthan the wind and the momentum of the train, another force pushed me to the ground. My head and chest hit first, them my hips and legs. Again,I felt the power of the train, the shaking of the ground, the roar of it moving over me. The force of the weight pushing me down hurt more than anything else." --Page 5, "Life In Spite of Me" where Kristen tells of her suicide attempt.
SummaryAdd a Summary
At 17, Kristen Anderson, having suffered the death of friends and a rape, attempted to commit suicide. She laid down on the railroad tracks, 33 freight-cars passed over her, it was too foggy to life flight her out, and she had lost 8 pints of blood, when loss of 5 is enough to kill. She was meant to be alive. In this book, her autobiography, she tells of the force she felt holding her down on the tracks so she wasn't sucked up into the train.She tells of her recovery, of waking up to realize her legs were gone, of challenges with some doctors who didn't believe she could recover and of adjusting to a new life in the freedom of faith. Founder of "Reaching You Ministries," her Web site is http://www.reachingyouministries.com/ .
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